THE RADICAL BLOG NOW OPEN
Follow the link above to Enty's Diary, a regula...oh, you're already here! Enjoy!
Dedicated to a life I never had and a life I've only just begun
Right, I have a blog. Oops. Anyway, it is currently real misanthropy hours. I'm so hopeless, I cannot convince myself that this planet and everyon on it is doomed. I cannot convince myslf that everyone is not either stupid or malicious. And I've just been so angry at that, it's like...I have this rage, deep inside. I just hate everything, I hate everyone. It's not like I hate EVERY human, I have many human friends and know many excellent people but humanity as a concept, a species and a society? As a history? Abhorrent. I'm disgusted by my own physical humanity too, especially when I get like that. I can't even bear to look at myself sometimes. I mean...these things are LITERALLY killing their planet and themselves and they don't give a shit. I hate it, I hate everyone.
In other news I started watching RWBY. Animation's a bit uh...well, not great, at times, but honestly? I'm having fun with it. I like Penny and Yang.
I'm going to the National Museum of Computing in Bletchley Park on the 31st! I will be taking many photos and putting them up on a page on this website. I'm most looking forward to seeing their EDSAC replica.
I just...I want to feel like there's hope, even a glimmer of hope, somewhere on this rock. But I can't really see that right now. All I want to do is go back to Etheria, to a place that I'm pretty sure wasn't close to global catastrophe last time I was there. And if it was, frankly, I probably caused it by accident, but that's neither here nor there. I think I just want to start doing stuff more for myself than for a world that doesn't care. Nothing I do for it makes any difference, so why should I continue? I don't think I will - I think I'll focus on self improvement and self fulfillment. Which involves losing weight, actually making my body feel more like MY body, learning all the things I want to learn and feeling like I've achieved things or made things to be proud of. I hope I can stick to my goals.
3rd May, 2021
My Amiga 600 is having issues and I can't figure out what or why! It all started when I was playing Lemmings - fantastic game by the way - with my 1MB RAM expansion card in that came with the computer. Suddenly the game crashed and I was treated to some stunning but concerning glitch art. Upon a refresh, I entered into the yellow screen of death. This continued until I took the expansion out, at which point the amiga booted just fine. Probably an expansion issue, right? Maybe. I bought a second expansion from a different site, and a different make. I inserted it in, booted fine. Everything was fine until I made the fatal mistake of playing Lemmings again. The EXACT SAME THING happened! Except this time now the brand new expansion enters into a green screen loop instead of yellow. I've taken the amiga apart, everything looks fine, cleaned all the contacts, inspected the solder joints. No luck. Grrrr! Apparently the A600 fails all the time - perhaps I should have bought an Amiga 500 for less. At least my 48k spectrum still works, so I've been using that instead.
Yesterday I mentioned on Twitter I thought about doing a podcast about retro computing, gaming and technology in general. Lamenting my worries that many would be dismayed at hearing a 25 year old girl who wasn't around for those times talking about the machines they have memories of, I recieved responses from people saying they'd actually appreciate a new light being shon on the stuff they grew up with! I think a podcast about retro that doesn't just focus on nostalgia and memories would be just what the scene needs, honestly. Maybe I should do it!
28th February, 2021
This is my first blog entry. It's not much. I'm actually going through a lot right now but I don't wanna talk about that. Instead I'm gonna talk about what this website means to me. This is mine, my little space of the internet. I want to make a place I can truly be myself and be free in, and safe. I want to make my mark on the service I spend so much of my time on - the web. Some day all I am will be on here, all that I want and think and write. I hope to remain alive to make it happen, for as long as possible. God knows I'm gonna try. I'm an Etherian Princess on earth, I want to make my time here as good as possible. And I hope I can make everyone's stay on this website great. And honestly, I hope I can make peoples' stay on this planet a bit better. I think we all need it right now. Thanks for listening.
26th February, 2021